Here at Defenders of the Faith, we (and by “we”, I mean me), pride our selves on not having any bias towards any artist or label whatsoever. There are no special interests at hand here, financial or otherwise, which is more than some other online metal outlets can say, but I digress. With that said, I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t a handful of labels I can rely on for new, kickass metal music. There’s Dying Victims Production, whose roster runs the gamut from traditional to extreme. Hells Headbangers specializes in all things filthy and infernal, while Redefining Darkness and Unspeakable Axe are bound to deliver the deadliest metal out there today. And when I’m in the mood for something more on the AOR/hard rock side of the spectrum, I can almost always rely on Frontiers. The key word here is “almost”.
Meet Bloody Heels. On paper, this band should rule. Their name and look screams 80s throwback. There’s also a press release that touts them as “the missing link between Crashdïet and Crazy Lixx”, which makes no fucking sense considering both of those bands subscribe to the same sleaze metal ethos. Like, dude (and I can’t believe I’m typing so informally), if you’re a sleaze metal band too, just say so. It ain’t that hard! Only Bloody Heels isn’t a sleaze metal band. In fact, calling them a hard rock or AOR band is quite the stretch as well, at least within the traditional confines of those genres. There are facets of both styles on their latest album, Rotten Romance; facets that get caught between a web of generic production and predictable songwriting.
Rotten Romance does have its moments. “The Velvet” and “Distant Memory” are the closest to orthodox AOR we get, with the latter infusing molten metal riffs and a dose of retro adrenaline. I could imagine the kids in Stranger Things riding their bikes to this one-two melodic rock punch. There’s also “Hour of Sinners”, which despite its simplistic approach, is too brazenly anthemic for me to NOT get down to. All that’s missing is the booming voice of legendary WWE wrestler/commentator Jerry “The King” Lawler, proclaiming, “This is Monday Night Raw!!!”
As for the rest of Rotten Romance, it falls flat in almost every way imaginable. There are times where times where these songs almost “make it”. For example, “Mirror Mirror” is a semi-entertaining headbanger that attempts to capture the Slave to the Grind era Skid Row sound, but it’s nothing I haven’t heard before. The same observation can be made for “Burning Bridges”, which with the right tweaking, could be a solid AOR song, but alas, leans too hard on oft abused clichés. Furthermore, what really holds this album back is its reliance on drop-tuned guitar riffs and pedestrian vocals, as if this were tailor made for American corporate rock radio. This dull post-grunge approach really doesn’t blend well with music that’s associated with hedonism, happiness, and fun.
By the time I got to the last few songs on Rotten Romance, I was hearing less Vain and more Mudvayne, as if everyone’s favorite B grade nu metal hanger-ons listened to a Night Ranger album and said, “You know what? Let’s try this!” The fact that I even had to type the name “Mudvayne” on this site should be a criminal offense in and of itself. Now I can’t speak for Bloody Heels past work as I haven’t listened to it. Maybe this was just the obligatory “experimental” album they needed to get out of their system before going back to what they do best? I don’t know. I just know there’s nothing fresh about this album: It’s the missing link between stale and, you guessed it, rotten.
4 out of 10
Label: Frontiers Records
Genre: Hard Rock
For fans of: Skid Row, Avenged Sevenfold, Kissin’ Dynamite